After packing raw fish and pig and lugging around chocolate mac's

... I am finally here at the airport. What would have been a 5 hour flight to San Jose, I chose to be frugal and take a cheaper flight instead, prolonging this journey home by another 5 hours, double the actual time. I am now waiting in Seattle airport, which I think is quite huge and somewhat meticulous in terms of their relocating passengers to other terminals, remote from the main exit.

So what am I feeling? I still feel like all of this is surreal, that everything I see is far from reality. I say this because, while I was walking towards my designated terminal just moments ago, I walked passed what seemed like a corner store of 4th of July memorabilia on sale. This whole area was flooded with red, white, and blues. Don't get me wrong, I do love being in the U.S. for reason being that I can finally drink tap water without taking several trips to the bathroom throughout the day and several other unmentioned reasons, but I found so much more security in being overseas and meandering about, taking everything in as if I was a newborn, learning to become familiar with my senses.

But this is it. I'm an hour away from boarding in the cold winter... oh god, please let it be spring already! I seriously dislike this tingle I'm feeling in my body. It's a mixture of anxiety and goosebumps. Both, just uncomfortable feelings.

Anyway, my last day spent in Hawaii was spent with Diana, Ellen Mae and Philip. Ellen Mae took me to some beautiful sights like Port Lock look out point and the Moana Waterfall Park. Due to time, no waterfall was seen. I could only imagine what kind of beauty is found in here though. I seriously felt like I was in the a what I imagined a rain forest looks like. After, we had a last dinner and headed out.

Blah.

I feel like a mess right now. Everything I see makes me want to cry. Not that it breaks my heart, but I feel like I miss a lot of things that what I see in front of me is just not the same emotion I felt while traveling. I also feel really emotional because I keep thinking about this quote...

“I like to see people reunited, I like to see people run to each other, I like the kissing and the crying, I like the impatience, the stories that the mouth can’t tell fast enough, the ears that aren’t big enough, the eyes that can’t take in all of the change, I like the hugging, the bringing together, the end of missing someone.”

- Jonathan Safran

I kept seeing people departing from one another. I saw soldiers off-duty looking at their phones, staring at their children's faces as their wallpaper background, the 2 women next to me, smiling gleefully because this short experience they had in Hawaii was so memorable that they had to leave wearing lei's around their necks... ahh and so many more images that made me think of connections people had all over the world, whether back home or with these foreign places.

On the brighter side, I actually will be continuing my travels for another week! I'm going to NY with in about a week, so this blog will probably be up for another few weeks... we'll see.

Time for boarding! I have knots in my stomach and I feel like throwing up.

I hope I feel better when I get home.